Much as it may seem like a good idea, breathplay can be risky at the best of times. It can be fun if you’re doing it in company, but is best avoided completely if you’re on your own. It’s estimated that up to 250 people in the USA and 60 people in the UK are accidentally killed every year through noose-related wanking accidents. Apart from anything else, it’s an embarrassing way to die. There are some useful guidelines on erotic asphyxiation here in The Deviants’ Dictionary which I hope will encourage everyone to be a bit more careful. And on that note, RIP television presenter Kristian Digby.

(p.s. People often ask about the purpose of the orange or lemon in the mouth. Well, the idea is that you bite down on it at the point of orgasm and the citrus rush wakes you up enough to free yourself from the ligature. This regularly fails.)

Here are a couple of paragraphs from a very interesting “OPEN LETTER TO WOMEN” on AlterNet. It perfectly expresses something every Dominatrix agonises over – the gulf between the fantasy and the reality of what a powerful woman really is:

“…In the last 10 years, heels have become higher and higher. Pushing aside the fact that most women can’t walk on these 4-6″ stilts and look like they’re carrying a load in their diapers, heels are bad for our bodies and ultimately displace our vital organs. Seriously, they displace our vital organs.

And, yet, they are de rigeur in fashion now. Look up and ask one of these women why they wear them. I’ve done that. They say they feel powerful in these heels. They feel sexy in these heels. They feel unconquerable. The dominatrix in them has an acceptable place for expression. I’ll ask them again in 10 years when they have bad backs, fallen arches and depression. I’ll ask when they have broken up someone’s marriage only to find themselves alone again as the man moves on to someone else. Or they get their man only to discover that now they’re the victims of adultery.

Feminism has failed if women only find their their power through sexuality. Women have failed. You see, your powerful sexuality only lasts about 15 years of your long life. After that, it costs a lot of money to keep that shit going. And, by then, your intelligence and empathy have atrophied. And, what have you to show for it? No man, no friends and the derision of history.

The sad truth is that expressing your power through sexuality is a disservice to yourself and to all other women. It perpetuates the myth that men want continued. Looking at hot women in tight dresses wearing stiletto heels is a sexual fantasy that they don’t want to give up. Their hard-on is imminently more valuable to them than your success…”

For the full article, click here.