Tag Archives: humour

Disappointingly Realistic Erotica

Below is a tiny snippet of a delightful post by Kate M at the Pleasure Chest – “Disappointingly Realistic Erotica:
Whips & Chains”.

“…I turned my attention to my hostess. I had been aching to undress her all evening, ever since I spotted her across the fetish gala in a latex catsuit that clung to every perfect inch of her body. Its polished surface seemed to glow in the moonlight.

With trembling hands, I obliged her request, pulling gently at the zipper just below her hairline. The catsuit peeled away from her as I unzipped, exposing her inexpressibly beautiful body to the night air. Underneath it, her skin was clammy and reeked of talcum powder and many hours’ worth of stale sweat…”

Read the rest and laugh your actual arse off here.

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Critique Your Dickpics

Being a woman on the internet, I’m often sent unsolicited dick pics. However, much like this blogger on Tumblr, it’s not the size or shape I’m interested in. It’s composition, lighting and artistic flair that does it for me. Read all of the posts on “critiquing your dick pics with love” as each is a work of genius. Below is one of many amusing examples (click here to see the actual pic – NSFW obviously, as it’s a knob):

‘this is what i like to call “the log”. 

“the log” is when you take a bird’s eye view, close-up shot of your enormous dick, with your dick taking up most of the frame & with very little surrounding detail. dudes, they’re boring. they’re ~so~ boring. they say “look at my fat cock” & fuck all else. they say “i’m hung, but i’m remarkably dull”.

i have a backlog of approximately 7,800 logs in my inbox & i never want to see another log in my life… your dick pic gets a D.’

For the full glory of this blog, logs and all, click here.

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Slides Rule You

Photos of Slides that Rule You, thanks to Rapscallion Collective.