I don’t normally post links to individual videos here, but this week’s Clips4Sale piece of NSFW gender-norm subversion is the exception. I’m cross-dressing again. I’m a Mafia Don, wearing a strap-on and getting a handsome henchman to suck it. Such is the life of a Dominatrix. Go here to see the video.

Today, I learned a new word. If you haven’t heard of “negging”, it’s grim.

Wiki Answers defines it thus: “Negging is a term used by pick up artists such as in the book ‘The Game’ and ‘The Mystery Method’. It means to insult a girl playfully to increase her interest in you.” The instructional douchebaggery website So Suave tells its desperate readership that a “neg hit” is “a remark, sometimes humorous, used to point out a woman’s flaws.” The top rated entry at Urban Dictionary calls negs “Low-grade insults meant to undermine the self-confidence of a woman so she might be more vulnerable to your advances.”

Oddly enough, a similar thing happens to Pro-Dommes, albeit in a financial context. We’ve all had it many times. A demanding stranger will insist that we give him free sessions, claiming that we can’t be real lifestyle Dommes and must surely be money-obsessed, gold-digging materialists if we refuse to do our actual job for free, for him.

When we were newbies, some of us were hit by a sudden moment of self-doubt when faced with the first influx of negging subs. The doubts quickly evaporated: “Do I deserve the title of Dominatrix?” we would all think for a fraction of a nanosecond. “Can I call myself a lifestyle and Pro-Domme if I don’t give this random clinger off the internet my undivided attention during a recession and then inevitably won’t be able to afford to buy myself food or heat my home? Wait… yes. Yes I can. That’s that settled then.”

Here’s a gem from my Adultwork inbox this week:

From: op90

*blocked*

Click here to see today’s XKCD’s comic strip where a negging man gets his comeuppance:

Regular readers might be under the misconception that I single out the Daily Mail, of all publications, for sustained, irrational hatred.

I don’t. Firstly, my hatred is completely rational. Secondly, other publications are also pretty shit at times.

This week, the Mirror shat out a feature on “Women Who Kill”. Of course, the stereotype of the murderous female can be sexy and alluring, and in films, television, novels and BDSM erotica, the image of the dark, deadly femme-fatale has long been fetishised. Unfortunately for the Mirror, real killers are rarely attractive. This is why they nicked a photo of a beautiful woman off the internet to illustrate an article about prolific, early 20th century serial killer Vera Renczi. The woman concerned is actually Morgana. She is a photographer, artist and model and – as far as I’m aware – hasn’t killed anyone, but has done lots of gorgeous retro, corsetry and fetish-clothing photographs that are a joy to peruse. The Mirror will issue an apology in tomorrow’s edition. Here’s the original photo on her Facebook page, here’s her website, and here’s the Tabloid Watch article that further explores the Mirror’s utter fuckery over this issue.